Happy Farter’s Father’s Day
Father’s Day can be depressing for people who have lost a father or a child. I decided that we would celebrate Farter’s Day instead. (To put the poem in context, you should know that we have twin toddlers who are somewhat gluten and dairy intolerant.)
We Just Can’t Hold It In
He gets a whiff and wonders
Is it time to change a diaper?
He checks them both to find out
Do I wipe him? Do I wipe her?
He holds his daughter upside down.
It gives her such a thrill.
The smell he gets back in return
Is quite the bitter pill.
Who wants to get some Timbits?
Their joy just warms his heart.
He drives them to the playground
In a car that’s full of farts.
He goes into the bathroom
Thinking he’ll have time alone.
A toddler insists on coming
To watch him on his porcelain throne.
He takes a break to sit down
But it’s quite the social gaff!
He’s on a woopy cushion.
It makes the children laugh.
He lies down on the floor.
The kids blow on his belly.
Quite the farty sound it makes.
At least it isn’t smelly.
So for all the things you do all year,
The love we’ve always felt it.
Happy Farter’s day to you and yours…
And he who smelt it dealt it.
© Jacquify 2021
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